Instead of my usual route I’m gonna take a detour. Let’s just see where the road less taken gets me. Since it’s fuck the rules, right?
I’m gonna entertain the idea that i’m simply too much for you niggas. and also that *you* were not good enough.
People seek you out for being this (according to them) enigmatic, otherworldly being. The minute your humanity makes an appearance niggas start malfunctioning. The very moment you need something. I know we’re not *supposed to* be needy, but if i can’t be needy with you every once in a while, why the fuck are you here?
Oh fuck. i forgot I have to be this golden, shiny, perfectly put together ass bitch every minute of my fucking life.
You realize they never wanted you. They want the facade. The fantasy. The pretty parts. You realize they never knew you, and never had the capacity to. Bitch, you need a well! These niggas don’t have the depth of a fucking teaspoon.
So now you’re no longer the woman with universes inside her. You’re just this insignificant thing. The ornamental dumpster.
They wanna play with you incessantly for weeks. Undress you. Scatter your belongings. Fuck your hair up and pull you apart limb by limb. Leave you in the corner somewhere on the floor ‘cause fuck a shelf. Fuck a place to belong. Your shit already broken, so you don’t deserve the same reverence or care you did when you were shiny and untouched.
There’s a history of LACK and ineptitude from *your* kind. That’s just fucking facts. I’ve managed to not only shoulder your transferred burden of inadequacy, but also internalized it. Wore it like i bought it when really you left your shit here and i never got rid of it.